I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
