If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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