But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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