Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
i want to swaddle you in tequila
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Randomize
