I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
