Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
