so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
