Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
