so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
