yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
