The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
