Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
