Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
