whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
