for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
