Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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