i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
