I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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