I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
