So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
