I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
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