I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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