This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
