Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
