literally had 100 drinks last night.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
