Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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