people are starting to question the shark bite story
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
