I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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