loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
