I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
