no, he came in my armpit
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
