so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
no you cant smoke seaweed
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
