She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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