So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
