I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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