new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
