the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
