can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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