My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
i now understand why vodka
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
