so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
