she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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