You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize