I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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