i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
love makes seman taste better
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
