You're so nebulous sometimes
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
