When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
sex in a hospital.. check
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
