So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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