I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
