Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
farters have to be the big spoon...
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
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