question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
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